How to Hire the Best Wedding Professionals – Part 1

This is the first in a series of posts about how to hire the best wedding vendors for your wedding day. Hiring the right team is critical to planning your dream wedding...and it can also be quite stressful.

How do you find the right match for you? How do you know who to trust? Where do you go for advice?

First of all, this is not an easy task and it's totally normal for couples to feel overwhelmed, frustrated or confused. It's not like you plan a wedding every day! This is all probably brand new to you, so be patient with yourself.

Photographer Booth Image

All of the wedding professionals we recommend on this site are individuals we consider to be the best of the Hudson Valley. That's a good place to start your search.

But there are certainly other great professionals out there. A few tips on finding the right ones for you...

Do Your Homework. You'll get much more out of a meeting or conversation with a wedding professional if you do a little background homework first.

Spend some time on the internet or talking to friends who've recently been married. Find out the average prices in your area and what services are available. Get an idea of what you like and don't like. Wedding websites and chat rooms can be a great resource. This way when you meet with a wedding professional you'll be able to ask better questions and have an idea of what to look out for.

Here are some excellent wedding resources to check out.

Meet With Them. An in person meeting is the best way to interview a potential wedding vendor. It lets you get the full experience of their personality, style and professionalism. If that's not possible, have a phone conversation.

Ask Questions. There are no stupid questions! Make sure you get clear, specific answers to your questions. If you aren't sure what something means, ask them to clarify. Keep asking questions until you completely understand.

If a wedding vendor has a problem with you asking questions, they probably aren't the one for you. The best wedding professionals are patient, understanding and take the time to help you make the best choices for your wedding.

Listen. Don't just hear the words they say, really listen. Watch the vendor's body language. Are they confident and comfortable with their response? Do they look and sound nervous? Do you get a "funny feeling" about them? Take all the sights, sounds and feelings into account along with their verbal responses; if your gut tells you something isn't right, it probably isn't.

Check References. Portfolios are hand-picked to show off the best work, but they may not represent the "average" wedding performance. Videos are edited for the optimum presentation. But real referrals from satisfied clients are hard to fake.

Call up both client and professional references. Ask questions and use those listening skills. Even if they give a rave review, you'll often be able to "read between the lines" if there were any issues or problems.

Ask around and search the internet for reviews. Check the Better Business Bureau for any outstanding complaints against the business. Weigh all of this information into your choices.

Here are 8 questions to ask ALL your potential wedding professionals:

1)  How many weddings do you do per year? How much experience do you have?

This is an extremely important question. Ideally, your wedding professional should have ample experience specifically with weddings. Not only will they be more skilled in their craft, this also makes them a valuable source of information and ensures that your wedding day goes smoothly.

2)  How much do you cost?

Price is often relative, especially when you factor in experience, reputation and expert skill. Generally, the most talented professionals have a higher price tag because their skill level, reputation and experience justify their rate.

3)  How much is the deposit?

4)  What specifically is included in that cost?

Because packages often vary, it's likely that you won't be able to compare one vendor exactly to the next without doing a little figuring. The lowest cost isn't necessarily the best deal; some higher quotes include services that you have to pay extra for in other packages. Make sure you take this into account.

5)  What happens if I cancel? What happens if you cancel?

Find out if your deposit is refundable under any conditions. Does the wedding professional have a back up plan if something happens to them?

6)  Do you use a contract?

If the answer is No, RUN! A contract is designed to protect both you and the wedding professional. Don't settle for a verbal agreement that won't hold up in court.

7)  Are there any additional fees?

Taxes, service charges and travel fees can add up quickly. Make sure you understand exactly what is included in the price and if there are any other fees you'll have to pay. This should be clearly defined in your contract.

8)  Do you carry liability insurance?

The answer you're looking for here is Yes. This protects you in case an unfortunate accident should occur on your wedding day. It's also a sign that this is a reputable business, since most "fly by night" operations don't invest in insurance.

It's worth taking a little time to assemble the best team for your wedding day, especially for the products and services that are most important to you.  If chosen wisely, the right wedding vendors will give you expert help and advice...for FREE!

Did I miss any questions you should ask?  Got any questions about hiring your wedding vendors?  Leave me a comment.

The Debate Rages On: Amateur vs. Wedding Professional

First, let's put this out there: I am a wedding professional, which means my opinion on the issue is obviously biased.

Is it appropriate to hire an amateur or hobbyist to work your wedding? The answer: it depends. Let's walk through the pros and cons to see if we can figure this one out.

PROS

$$ Savings. You can save thousands of dollars on the cost of your wedding by hiring amateurs instead of wedding professionals.

A Blank Slate. An amateur hasn't seen much, so they don't have an expectation of how weddings are "supposed" to go. They might be eager to prove themselves and do whatever you like, but they'll need lots of guidance from you to do it.

CONS

Lack of experience. A seasoned wedding professional has attended hundreds of weddings and spent thousands of hours refining and working on their craft. An amateur doesn't have the experience, the resume or the credibility.

An amateur doesn't know where to stand, what to do or how to do it nearly as well as a professional. What comes naturally for a wedding professional...directing the flow of events, trouble shooting issues before they become a problem, acting as an expert resource for you...is completely lacking in an amateur. They just don't have as much to offer due to their lack of experience.

Lower Quality. Amateurs haven't spent the hours practicing and perfecting their work yet. The quality of products and services generally won't be as good as they are when you hire a professional. They might be, but it's a crap shoot.

Questionable Reliability. An amateur hasn't built up a reputation yet and doesn't have the pressure to maintain it. If she messes up, she can say Oops and go back to her day job.

Will they deliver on their promises?  Will they show up on time?  Will they show up at all?  Maybe, maybe not. It's a big gamble hiring someone without a proven reputation for service and quality.  This can mean a boatload more anxiety and stress for you.

No Contract Means No Protection. A true professional works with a contract outlining the specifics of your agreed terms of service. This protects you as well as them.

If you do business with an amateur who doesn't use a contract and something goes wrong, you won't have a leg to stand on in court.

If you are considering whether it's a good idea to hire a wedding professional or a talented amateur, follow these guidelines to avoid a wedding disaster.

1) Hire professionals for your most important wedding priorities.

Spend a little time thinking about what is most important to you on your wedding day. Is it the photos? The music? The beautiful location?

If it's important to you, spend the money to hire a professional. If you must hire an amateur, hire them for services you don't care as much about.

2) If you expect professional service, hire a professional.

If you have an expectation of delicious gourmet food, original artistic photos, non-stop dancing and a seamless flow of events, have a wedding professional provide these services. If less than professional service is acceptable, consider an amateur.

Imagine the worst case scenario (like in these videos below) and ask yourself if this is acceptable for your wedding day. If it's not, hire someone with the talent, reputation and experience to deliver what you expect.

3) Hiring an amateur means more work for you.

An amateur doesn't have experience with the ins and outs of a wedding including timing and scheduling. You will have to tell him exactly what to do.

Know going in that you will be responsible for doing the research to learn what's necessary. Then you'll have to set up timelines and to do lists for them. On the day of the wedding you'll have to manage and check up on them.

If you have a tight budget, of course you need to pinch pennies wherever possible. An amateur might be a part of that; just make sure it makes sense for you. And don't automatically rule out hiring a pro; there are wedding professionals who provide services in every price range, from low to high end.

I surveyed dozens of brides after their weddings and the #1 regret was NOT hiring a professional for a service that was important to them...usually a photographer.

Amateur Wedding Disasters

Watch the video below for an example of what can happen when you hire an amateur to MC and DJ your wedding. Not only are the announcements embarrassingly clumsy, but the entertainers actually lose the First Dance Song! This is truly PAINFUL to watch.

Check out the video below to witness the aftermath of hiring an amateur photographer. It ends up with a tearful bride in court.

One of our smart, savvy DIY brides a few years ago decided to arrange her own floral centerpieces. She saved hundreds of dollars by ordering roses in bulk from a wholesaler, but she told me it was a huge hassle putting them together during that busy week before the wedding.

She did spend the money to have a professional florist create her bouquets and boutonnieres. She could really tell the difference between the arrangements she did and the ones done by a professional. In hindsight, she would have paid the extra money...and saved her sanity...by having her centerpieces professionally done.

Finally, I'll share my own experience. When Jeff and I got married almost 10 years ago we had almost no wedding experience.  We had a photo hobbyist friend take our photographs. It was super cheap; she only charged us for the cost of her film and development.

However, the results are not professional. Our photos are just okay. She didn't ask us if we wanted any family photos...and I didn't know to ask at the time...so there isn't one photograph of my mother-in-law. Ouch.

Hiring an amateur might work out great. It will certainly save you money. Just make sure you think carefully about the consequences and weigh those pros and cons so that you can make an informed decision. Your wedding day is too important to leave it to chance!

What do you think about hiring an amateur for your wedding day?

Exploring the Possibilities of Planning a Mid-Week Wedding

Weddings during the week are becoming increasingly popular. We've personally attended weddings on Wednesday, Thursday and even non-holiday Mondays.

Some of these groups partied as hard as any Saturday night. Some didn't. So what's the secret?

Let's explore the pros and cons of the mid-week wedding, shall we?

PROS

Savings. This is reason #1 most couples choose to have a wedding during the week. And you can definitely reap the benefits!  Wedding vendors typically have less demand for these dates, so you can save a bundle.  It can easily knock $5,000 or more off the cost of your wedding.

Photo by Myles Studio

Dream Wedding on a Budget. If you're planning a wedding on a budget, choosing a mid-week date may allow you to afford the location of your dreams without having to compromise. You can opt for deluxe packages, hire your favorite wedding vendors and upgrade services with the extra room in your budget.

Increased Flexibility and Availability. The most in-demand wedding venues and professionals often book up quickly. By planning a mid-week wedding you'll have access to your top picks who may already be booked up on the weekends. Wedding vendors also tend to be more flexible with hours, packages and pricing.

CONS

Inconvenience. You may have to put up with lots of grumbling and complaining from your guests. If your guests are local, they probably have to work the next day and they'll be worrying about getting home on time and stopping themselves from drinking too much. Out of town guests will be forced to take vacation time off. Frankly, it may be a huge inconvenience for them.

Party Inhibitor. This isn't always the case, but if your guests are worried about getting to work the next day they might not shift into party mode. You may not achieve that "hanging from the chandeliers" party brides often hope for if your guests are checking their watches.

Compromise. You might have to compromise one priority, such as keeping your guests dancing all night, in exchange for having your dream wedding venue. In any case, you'll have to adjust your expectations to the reality of the mid-week wedding.

If you're considering a mid-week wedding, the most important factor is to manage your expectations. As long as you take into account the pros and cons listed above, you can adjust your wedding vision to fit the reality.

Ask yourself these questions: Is your environment most important? Is dancing top priority? What MUST you have for your wedding day and what is an "extra?"

Make sure your musts are met and let go of the rest.

Photo by Majestic Studios

What can you expect?

This really depends totally upon you and the family and friends who will be attending your wedding.

Think long and hard about the reality of a mid-week wedding reception. Are your guests the type who party no matter what? Will they mind taking time off in the middle of the week? Are they traveling? Will they have to get the kids up for school the next morning...with a hang-over? Does your location lend itself to the mid-week wedding experience you have in mind?

If you aren't sure what to expect, ASK. Your guests will be more than happy to tell you what they think about your idea. (Believe me!) And ask wedding professionals for their opinion about what's likely for the location you've chosen and what you have in mind. They've seen enough to give you an honest opinion about whether or not your expectations are realistic.

When It Works

Darcie and Nick were teachers. People on both sides of their family were teachers. The couple chose to have a Thursday night wedding in July at Colonial Terrace.

The result? Their wedding vendors offered extremely competitive prices, which meant Darcie could afford the dress and location she really wanted. Since many of her guests were teachers, they were already off for summer vacation, and their close friends who attended didn't mind taking off the next day. Their guests partied hard until the very last song.

Courtney and Neil chose a non-holiday Monday for their Grandview wedding reception. Neil had just graduated from West Point two days before and both families were from out of town. They turned planned an extended party weekend for all their guests.

The result? The couple saved thousands of dollars and was able to afford their dream location. Many of their guests planned to be in town anyway for the graduation and all of them were in relaxed, vacation mode.  They danced all night.

When It Doesn't Work So Well

Karen and Bob planned their wedding on a Thursday evening. Most of their guests were older family and many were driving into the Hudson Valley from NYC or Long Island. The wedding was scheduled to last until 10pm.

Photo by Blue Sky Photography

The result? The wedding went WAY too late for her guests.  Older family starting saying goodbye immediately after dinner. By the end of the party only a handful of friends were left.  Karen had envisioned a packed dance floor, and even though her wedding was beautiful, stylish and elegant, she felt disappointed.

The Verdict

Only you can determine if a mid-week wedding is right for you. First, determine your priorities and expectations. Weigh the pros and cons, poll your guests and get the opinion of your wedding vendors. It can rock or it can flop...so know your crowd.

What do you think about planning a mid-week wedding? Have you ever been to one?

How To Plan the Perfect Honeymoon...

So you have started planning your wedding and now you're thinking about a honeymoon. A honeymoon is the traditional holiday taken by a newly married couple to celebrate  their marriage in seclusion. These trips usually involve going somewhere exotic or special or romantic. It's a time for both you and your fiancé to relax, unwind, explore and enjoy each other. Your dream honeymoon will take some time and effort to arrange. But your vision can come to life if you do the 5 musts for your Perfect Honeymoon.

1) Budget. Surely, you two have discussed how much you plan on spending on your wedding day. That task was daunting, I'm sure. This decision is no less important as your previous discussions. But you must come to a consensus now. You need to take into consideration not only the costs of travel, but the cost of accommodations, meals, activities and entertainment. You'll need to check with a travel specialist. Many companies also now offer honeymoon registries, which allow your family and friends to assist in paying for this occasion.

2) Destination. You two need to decide what type of honeymoon you want. Are you "adrenaline-holics" (you know bungee jumpers, zip line flyers or helicopter divers?) Or are you eco-adventurers (people who want to explore white-water rapids or watch whales frolic up close and personal, or would you enjoy spying sea lions on a rocky shoreline, or bald eagles soaring, or glimpsing blue herons in a photographer's paradise?) Or could you two be serious romantics looking forward to relaxing next to a calming sea, discovering historic sites and reveling in an afterglow of your festivities on a white sand beach?

You are also going to have to decide on your accommodations. The choice will probably be between a resort, a cruise, a hotel or a B&B. An all-inclusive resort will include meals and many options of activities; it may also include any bar bills you incur. This is a great option, if you think that bill might be high. But if not, you are paying for those drinks regardless. A cruise will cover all meals as well as most activities, although shore excursions are usually extra. But that doesn't mean that you two can't just leave the ship and explore on your own. Also, on most cruises, your bar bill is extra. A hotel may include an evening and/or breakfast but that is highly unusual. And, of course, you are on your own as far as activities go. And at a B&B it's just that-- you will pay for a bed and a breakfast. Everything else will be extra. Or you two may decide to take a tour--visiting historic sites in Israel would qualify. Or perhaps taking an African safari would be more to your liking. You should realize, however, that you will spend a lot if time grouped with the other folks on the tour. Depending on your couple style, you may opt to go hiking and camping. Of course, you won't have many champagne breakfasts in bed here. Just remember, this is a time when you want to get the most out of your dollar without over spending.

3) Duration. Most couples take from 5 to 12 days for a honeymoon. Depending upon how many days you require before your big day, it will determine how much time you have to spend on a honeymoon. But remember, you two don't need to depart the day following your nuptials. As a matter of fact, more and more couples are holding off on their honeymoon from a few days to a few months. This allows them to pay for their perfect honeymoon as well as have the time to enjoy it. You know how much time is realistically available for this fantastic holiday. Plan, plan, plan.

4) When to Go. Dependent upon your destination of choice, you can always opt for the prime season. For the Caribbean that means mid-winter. For Europe high season is definitely summer. If your ideal destination is Alaska or southern South America, that too is mid-summer. The issue in traveling to these places during their primary season is, that is when the prices are the absolute highest. Any agent can tell you when the cusps of the season begins and ends. You may decide to go then but you will have the advantage of understanding the differences in costs. Going during shoulder season, as this time is called, may allow you to shrink your costs by as much as 25%. Or it may allow you to do more on your honeymoon than you would otherwise be able to do. Your agent can tell you the most cost effective time to travel to your desired destination.

5) Assistance. At this point, you need to contact a professional. Most agents do not charge for their services. So do not be deterred from contacting someone who can truly help you. By all means surf the internet and check out the possibilities; everyone does. It will help your agent to know that you have done your homework and are ready to make some decisions. An agent knows all the ins and outs of resorts, B&Bs, cruise ships, and available activities.

Their experience is worth its weight in gold. Additionally, oftentimes, they have deals, discounts, upgrades and amenities that just aren't available to the public. (One couple I worked with really wanted a balcony stateroom, but their budget just wouldn't handle it. I am always on the lookout for upgrades available until the last moment before departure. Then about 2 weeks before their departure, I was able to get them an upgrade at a tiny fraction of the original balcony costs.) This doesn't always work but most travel professionals really do work hard to get you what you want at a price you can afford..

Planning your perfect honeymoon is not unlike finding your perfect wedding dress or coming up with a perfect signature cocktail for your reception. You need to decide how much to spend and where to go, then speak to a travel professional in whom you have confidence. Having your dream honeymoon is as simple as 1, 2, 3, 4, 5!

Emma McKnight is travel agent specializing in cruise vacations. View her website at: Cruise With Emma or contact her.